I wasn't going to do this publicly until properly presented in a published book, but that may never happen and recent events need to be documented now.
29 February a tiny 'elf shot' comes out of the back of my neck, see picture top right (magnified 700 and then 300 in photo editing package)
30th August a very important person in my life dies of systemic cancer suddenly.
22nd September a member of my household receives a bald triangular patch and a red sphere of blood from an injection of some kind above their right eye.
27th September same member is imprinted with an inverted triangular outline on the bridge of their nose.
On the 29th I found out that John Mack was killed in London. I found out from Unknown Country - Whitley Strieber -
"Dr. John Mack
Harvard professor and psychiatrist John Mack was hit by a car and killed in London on Monday night, September 27. After meeting UFO researcher Budd Hopkins in Cape Cod, where both of them spent the summers, Mack became intrigued by people who claimed to have UFO abductions. He professionally analyzed many of these people and found them to be sane and mentally stable and thus became one of the first scientists to take alien abduction seriously. His courage in risking his career by acknowledging the validity of the UFO phenomenon was highly valued and he will be greatly missed. "
30th September one month after the death in my family and this day is Ray Santilli's birthday.
On the 13th of January at approx 8am I saw a grey aerial object that looked like a boomerang flying low over a built up area. It was two wings and no tail with three soft round glowing white lights, two on each wing and one in the middle. Later that day I found my computer had to be reinstalled. Now I could be wrong, maybe it was a UFO, but here's a picture of a UAV CyberScout (though the object I saw did not look like this).
4am on the 24th October I woke up and got up, after about five minutes or less of eating crisps and houmous, I went back to sleep. Before I did I glanced at the clock again, and it was 5.44 am. So I lost an hour and forty minutes. Not alot one can do about that. It happens suddenly, there's no memory of it, you feel as if you have been conscious continually and that only a few minutes, like four, have gone by. You excuse it by assuming you've misread the clock, but if I really thought that I wouldn't bother writing it in. No memory of it and no interrpretation to provide. I had been reading about Betty and Barney Hill Page 275 of Mind Control World Control previously in the evening. So my thoughts are - that one was unknown. All the analysis afterwards which took six months may have convinced Barney that it was his worst fear - Nazis - and Jim Keith may be sure it's rich elite human controllers, but at root it's an unknown. Be aware that we are living in a digital tracking age but know it's not the whole answer.
I have seen both daylight and night-time ufos in London and abroad, but haven't officially reported them as I had no witnesses and no photographs. In Egypt we experienced spatial disorientation and irrational fear where upon we saw a Djiin - a magical whirlwind, which on closer inspection resolved itself into an old man who whisked leaves about with his hands. Not a lot you can do about that, just smile and walk on.
20:45 Thursday Feb 24 2005. After listening to most of Eminem's album which I swore I would never do as I hate the misogynistic murderer, but then isn't that what his lyrics are about, expressing through rage into understanding? The area around me became ice cold as if someone had opened a door from the arctic and I turned the 'music' off and put on a more mellow mooded tune collection - from 19.37 to 20.37 I meditated on a sheet of black paper while listening to The Verve 'Urban Hymns' - 'There is no space and time' or is the lyric actually 'There is no space in time'?. This scrying mode revealed to me an enormous steady Grey of 5'10" standing there watching me and to the left side a scene which varied. (It's the first time I've seen a Grey - translucently, though I have seen grey shades and flickers before) First it was a man (Truman?)stooping to kiss the Roswell Footage Alien, then it was Mae West, then Marilyn Monroe and Robert Kennedy, then it was a devilish, cherubic, pixieish creature with expressions. The large Grey remained throughout and was in the foreground, 'he' or it mouthed the word love but other than that did not move his lips. Thoughts which ran through my mind where these
1: men are perving on the idea of a prone woman who willingly cuts herself to death - aaaargh yuck, hatred.
2: Mae West was a strong individual woman who deliberately went against the tide of misogyny to reclaim space for women.
3: Marilyn Monroe died for rumours about aliens and John Kennedy was assassinated for it.
4: Magic and pixies and deceit and trickery have been with us all along, no matter what age or time.
5: And then the Grey seemed to mellow and the pixie smiled.
6: Then I got worried about being observed by a man while the 'Grey' was a screen image.
7: Then I thought about radioactive Nazis and people with withered grey dehydrated skin.
8: I thought about souls and the future and then I worried about genetically altered monkey-human hybrids, and the politics or lack of ethics of secret soldiers and mind control devices.
9: Does commenting on something propagate or destroy? Does providing something for interpretation by others (as they always will and will deviate from the pure intention of the creator, moderated through and tempered by the pulling of the thought into three dimensional existence) does that imply complicity if it all goes 'despicable'?
10: Where is the line of responsibility, and more than that - the influence for the good?
Additionally I thought Bush is the anti christ deceiving the nations.
The invisibles of the air and the lights and shapes in the sky are part of nature, beneficial to consider and inspiring thought.
I just hope they are not cyborgs in quorn.
Types of madness - gentic deficiency, chemical, biological or hormonal imbalance.
- isolation, talking to yourself and getting only a response from yourself.
- stress, too many bad things happening and God giving you more than you can handle although he said he wouldn't (so the Bible says).
- imposed from outside by people who dislike you or your opinions or your existence for social, political or economic reasons, ie heresy.
- grief, longing for someone who cannot or will not return, dying of a broken heart 'On the River of No Return' (that's Marilyn Monroe again) etc unrequited.
- rage too much hatred and anger leading to psychotic antisocial behaviour.
- not having anyone to talk to about it which makes you spin off and return again, finding the eye in the storm by maintaining isolation.
Anti-Feminism - if women speak then men use stereotypical anti-women abuse to silence them
- if women speak then they must stick to a sterile topic or else be accused of 'taking things too personally'.
- if woman complain they are accused of being 'ugly'
- if women don't complain they are accused of being 'ugly'
- generally women are just excluded under any other excuse.
- it is not ok to hate other races, but it is still ok to hate women.
That's anti-feminism and that is what feminism was designed to stop happening, so as it is still happening, there is still a need for every woman (and without being separatist about it, every man if possible) to be a feminist.
Grey areas - new technology, mental health law, sexual politics. Why do people believe in 'God' but not in 'Aliens'? Who are they praying to using telepathy in Church? Is it praying or is it an inclination to comply with the great phone tapper, bugging device spook? Mrs or Mr Omnipotent-all-hearing-all-seeing-all-pervasive. Do I need to draw my thoughts into 'art' or 'theory' or the socially acceptable cultural stereotype which you traditionally accept as your reality? Does age engender wisdom as in grey hair or is it something earned by over stressing? If you cross a hairless God with a monkey you may get a hybrid with hair in some parts and not in others - does that make bald Greys God or are they an image of the soul visiting us. Eyes are the window to the soul, so maybe large, teardrop shaped, black as night and watery, soulful eyes are the soul's windows - the inner spirit or Holy Ghost looking back at us, the missing one, the repressed other - condensced emotion - the Holy Mother.
The other recent time I had this experience of 'visioning' was at New Year when I saw Pacal Votan and the Roswell Alien, just their profiles interchanging.
Unknown Events Log 2004
In the midsummer of 1998 while visiting an ancient site there was an eerie loud breathing sound in the landscape which was rationalized as the sound of military maneouvres, testing or machinery. It was as if a huge dragonesque monster was breathing in my face invisibly. Later that day I saw a red orb of light in the sky which came down to the near horizon, from the direction of the object an invisible object, making a noise similar to a squeaky wheel or a strange bird traveled in an anticlockwise circular path around The West Kennet Long Barrow. This occured after sunset, in the evening when it was still light enough to see that there was nothing visible to account for the noise. Going into the Barrow by instinct I found there was a shaft of warm air from below the sky light to the ground in a column, though my explanation of it being air heated by sunshine from the day didn't seem a plausible reason. I stood in the column and channelled something verbally. At the end I was told to leave the Barrow by the experience and became frightened as if something was about to happen, and found it was midnight.
There have been other reports of this squeaky wheel noise in the area which I discovered afterwards. Apart from the red light, there was nothing to be seen. The trajectory of the sound was circular with the Barrow as the centre.
Same event, another review of it
In May 1998 I was at Avebury's West Kennet Long Barrow, camping with a friend. We saw in the evening a bright red light (no white, no green, just red, and without the noise of a helicopter or plane) which moved horizontally along in the sky (so it wasn't a flare) and then went down to the ground. From the direction of this light came a sound - like a cross between a squeaky wheel noise and a bird's caw - nothing I'd ever heard before or since, and it moved around the Barrow in a wide and perfect circle. It paused briefly near me, but there was nothing to be seen (it was light enough to see that there was nothing there so I think this was about 7 or 8pm) and then moved around the barrow with us chasing it. I said 'stop, this is just a distraction' and we headed back and went into the Barrow. There is a skylight in the main cave of the Barrow, and beneath this there was a column of warm air, though by now it was not due to the Sun's heat, if it ever had been,. It seemed inexplicable to me.. I stood in this and seemingly channelled some information, suddenly I became very scared and startled and said 'We must get out now!'. So we came out and went to our tent nearby, and it was exactly midnight! As it had taken about 20 minutes from start to finish, I think there was missing time. I was first alerted to UFOs by watching the Secret History documentary on Channel 4 (August 28th 1995) - The Roswell Incident, which screened the Santilli Autopsy Footage, with flashes of lightening for effect.. I came to watching a grey spinning thing dissolving in the corner of my room! After that I read everything I could about UFOs but didn't expect to see one myself. I have since made a website called RosUNwell.Co.UK which is an ufological encylopedia and have two newspaper clipppings archives for the Santilli Footage at Spacekey.Co.UK.
In most cases of paranormal experience, people find excuses to justify or explain them by saying it is a trick of the brain, exhaustion, stress, sleep deprivation. It may be best to ignore it for as long as possible and to look after your health. However there are moments when the contact is uncanny enough, patterned with coincidences or in a sequence of structure where the meaning is loaded with messages from an unknown, and you begin to accept an awareness which nevertheless you disavow for the sake of normality. The Channel Four Researcher who told me that they had to forget the Roswell Alien Autopsy Footage (Autospy?) and push it out of their mind in order to be capable of holding down their day to day job, succinctly described the nature of our need to cling to the reassuring continuation of our known three dimensional existence. Consider this: stare at the sky, or gaze at it and do you see sparkles? Do you see invisible yet perceptable entities there? Everyone does and explains it as 'floaters' on the surface of the eye ball which will move when you blink. Test it. My theory is that it is the souls of the dead - ghosts. The light of the soul would explain 'orbs', ufos, voices of the disincarnate, the sounds of bells in the air etc. When they are seperate they sparkle. As they gather, for any given purpose, perhaps simply to get the message of their existence across to us, they appear as shapes, colours, lights, and visions.
If, as many Hindu and Buddhist religions believe, the soul reincarnates after death, then we are all dead already and will be again, and have been many times over. Or is it that we have al been alive before and will be again.
An interesting thought is the photonic resonance which may vibrate us all into sparkles. A shift in being from a talking, hearing 3D individual into a consciousness with psychic connection, a mindsoup, group thought, a cloud of souls, a cloud ship - but on a much grander scale. Is this the New Age we've been hearing about? The transition and the reconnection with God, the Second coming, the quest of light in the darkness? The gospel according to John, 'in the beginning was the word'. If we are entering an anti-Bable era we will all join thoughts in a telepathic group soup, not sure we are ready for that, since human against human violence is still prevalent and the planet is being damaged by our greed and over consumption.
11th of June 2008, in a grade two listed rectory in Bridport, at 11.45pm a voice in the middle of the back of my head in an area taken up by a bed rest and a sloping attic roof, a voice said 'Boo'.
Woke up from a very powerful dream where i was only saved from death by my collar bone.
Having returned home, reluctantly from assisting wth the Brian Haw demo, due to overwhelming police presence, I slept after about three am.
The dream told me that the body of the Autopsied Alien was Tuttenkhamun, the best preserved mummy ever (it was a dream) and that it was very important, and that people had died to bring this information. That day I had gone to a certain local occult shop and enquired about something I dont want to talk about now.
Anyway, the point is that to the tune of Chinese music, the 'invisibles' tried to kill me as much as they could with piano wire (oblique recent Futurama reference) and my collar bone was all that saved me. When I woke I switched on the news and there was George Bush - the man who admits to international news that he talks to his father about 'pussy'. The George Bush pussy machine strikes again.
Lie back and think of England.
Wonder if this is why the huge cloud man I saw in Wiltshire was headless, cos he wasn't lucky enough to have a collar bone in the way when the Yakusa or whoever attacked.
Struggling with confidentiality issues is something all 'abductees', mind control sufferers or experiencers, or poetic minds have to negotiate. Most things in life are a fine line between judgement and risk and a personal sense of integrity.
Having been threatened with death, I've put my whole site back on, full on, but it is a site, a site is an entity in itself